Twenty isn't what it used to be

          I personally enjoyed this exercise very much. Not only did it give me an opportunity to spend time with people who probably would not have been my first choice, it reminded me of how lucky I am to be an able bodied, independent, unconfined, liberated woman. In reviewing my “research” J , I found that the couple who were 40 years older than me had it much rougher in their twenties than we did. Men were the breadwinners and were expected to get the job done without complaining. Women were homemakers who did not fathom the idea of equality. They had to care for the men, children, and home cheerfully. Men were expected to handle their problems on their own. It was not an option to go out and ask for help because times were getting too stressful. Men were expected to maintain their household without handouts, so there wasn’t too much time to dream of goals other than providing for the wife and kids. Women were expected to be polite and “lady-like” at all times. It was unheard of to go out with friends and ignore their duties at home. They were expected to rear as many children as possible and behave as good Christians. Single at 20 was an embarrassment to the woman and her family. It was unacceptable to publicly date casually for both men and women.
          The couple that I spoke to that was 20 years older than me didn’t seem to have it as rigorous in my opinion. The men were still expected to work and be the breadwinners, but they were also allowed leisure time with friends and associates. It was not acceptable for men to speak freely about their feelings or lounge around and do nothing with their days. Same sex relationships were taboo. Women were allowed the freedom to play with personal fashion and their appearance. They were free to go shopping with friends and host dinner parties. Women were not expected to be smarter than a man. Aspirations of women’s equality were rejected and frowned upon. If a woman became too vocal she was ostracized.
          20 year olds of today seem to be living in an entirely different world than their predecessors. Most 20 year olds do not have to worry about marriage or children until they are nearing their 30’s. Women in their 20’s have no qualms about expressing their perceived superiority over men, and men passively seem to accept their assertions for the most part (not to say that they necessarily agree with this). Women and men in their 20’s enjoy competing with one another on their level playing field. Men in their 20’s are free to complain about any and everything whether it is a loss in a game, a fight with a girlfriend, or some sort of car trouble. Staying out all night with friends is the norm for both men and women. If you are not invited out on “Friday night” you feel left out. This is a far cry from what previous generations concerned themselves with. 20 year olds in this day and age have uninhibited freedom. I don’t know if the freedom to do what one pleases at 20 is a curse or a blessing. Structure is great as long as it is not inhibiting. We are trusting 20 year olds to make responsible decisions that will impact their futures. May they make the most of their free will and always be safe and conscious of their repercussions.